For some time, there have been professionals meant to help young people navigate life’s challenges. In the past, these included teachers, coaches, school guidance counselors, even therapists. Now, there is a new group of people who specialize in providing support for college students and new graduates figuring out the next step and making important life decisions.

Have you ever wished for something greater in your life, only to find yourself unable to actually meet your goals? In some instances, does it even feel wrong for you to have success of any kind? There is some new research that may explain these thoughts and provide insight into how to make more positive choices.

In our busy world today, there are lots of things that we have to juggle: work, family, and other obligations. In fact, we may even feel that we are proud to be busy all of the time. However, Christine Carter of the Greater Good Science Center says that this mindset can actually be harmful.

A recent article in the New York Times talks about people who found their direction later in life. What did you like about this article?I think the most important take-away from the article is to never give up hope. I’ve worked with many people in their mid-to-late twenties who haven’t found what they want to do in life and feel that it’s already too late for them.

The article identifies four “core needs” at work. We have physical needs, like the need to have breaks that give us the opportunity to recharge. We have emotional needs, such as needing to know that our boss appreciates us. Mental needs include being allowed to focus on our work without being constantly interrupted.

I recently read an article about decision-making and self-esteem that makes a really interesting point. It says that when we’re making important decisions, we often only think about practical issues, such as how much a job pays or whether it gives us enough vacation time. We rarely ask, “What kind of person do I want to be?

How can a lack of self-confidence keep you from finding your direction in life? When you lack self-confidence, it’s easy to believe that you’re never going to be good at anything—even things that really matter to you. If you don’t feel that you can be good at something, finding a direction that feels right to you can seem hopeless from the start.

A sense of direction is easier to come by if your parents and teachers encouraged you to find out what you’re good at and what you like to do. Unfortunately, parents often have very specific ideas about who their children should be that don’t match who their children actually are.

How would you define “self-sabotage”? Defined most simply, self-sabotage means doing things that prevent you from reaching your goals.Can feedback from other people help someone recognize that they’re sabotaging themselves?

Is it a fact that people mess up their lives or is this just their impression?It really is a fact. I’ve worked with people who got the book contract they always wanted, and suddenly developed writers’ block. I’ve seen people get into the relationship that they’ve been looking for, and then either do something to push their partner away, or decide that there’s something wrong with relationship and end it.

“Driven” sounds a little aggressive. Are we talking Tiger Mother here? I think that phrase came into the culture with Rick Warren’s book, “A Purpose-Driven Life.” I haven’t read the book, but my sense is that people who talk about wanting to have a purpose-driven life are talking about wanting to feel that their life has a larger meaning beyond just satisfying their own individual desires

Is it even possible to live a life without purpose? If a purpose is something that organizes our life and tells us what’s important to us, probably everyone’s life exhibits some sort of purpose.

How do I know whether I’m an introvert or an extrovert? It can be confusing. If you enjoy social situations, you might think, “How can I be an introvert?” But if you spend time with your extroverted friends, you’ll find that they’re energized after spending time with other people, while you often feel the need to have some time for yourself in order to recharge.

We all think we know what an introvert is – someone who’s just shy. Is there more to it than that?It’s a very common misconception that introverts are people who are shy. There certainly are introverts who are shy, but many people who are introverted aren’t shy at all. The difference between extroverts and introverts really has to do with where we get our emotional energy.

Q. Isn’t it just logical to think you’d feel empty when you have done everything and have what you need?A. I don’t think most people’s goals are so limited that, once they achieve them, they necessarily feel empty. We can always do better at our jobs or deepen our relationships.

Q. How long after a tragedy is it even feasible to approach this question?A. It depends so much on the particular individual and what the tragedy means to them. The example that comes to mind is someone I worked with whose oldest friend was suddenly killed in a freak accident. Within a month or two of the accident, he realized he wasn’t doing well, that his whole world had fallen apart.

When did the struggle to find a life path become an issue? My sense is that it certainly accelerated in the ‘60s when a lot of people started feeling, “We don’t have to just follow the path that was dictated for us. My dad worked in a factory or an office but I don’t have to do that.”

Is it an innate result of parenting to set children on a path or does it require conscious effort? It’s complicated. Parents can certainly help their kids find their passion in life, but only if the parents are attuned to what the child cares about and aren’t pushing their own agenda.

Do we need to search for what we’re meant to do? Don’t most lives develop a purpose without our conscious effort? Yes, many people do find a sense of purpose naturally and without much conscious effort. Some people know from a very early age that they want to be a doctor or a writer or an engineer. Other people seem to find their purpose somewhat later in their lives but still fairly effortlessly—

How do most of us define a life purpose? Is there a common definition? For most people it’s having something that gives their life direction, something meaningful, something that makes them feel “This is what I’m here to do.”Must having a purpose in life be a weighty thing?